I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Randomize
