And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
