When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
