I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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