ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
