Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
