this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
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