i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
