how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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