So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
