I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
