The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
