oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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