The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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