She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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