Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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