Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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