I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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