This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
