I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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