I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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