Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Your dad touched me again.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
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