I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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