just tell him i said nine months
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
When are your genitals available?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Randomize