I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
