Plan B is the new Plan A
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
