We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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