on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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