white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
She needs sedatives and a leash
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
