Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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