There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize