This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
He felt like a one man threesome
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize