So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
