Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
