What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
