Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
you made out with another girl for some wings
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
