His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Randomize
