This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
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