I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
