What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize