so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
