I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
My balls are so social today.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
