Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
