It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Reggie can tackle my bush.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
