Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize