DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
