So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
