It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
So many bounce houses so little time
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
