I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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