How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
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