Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
where am i from again
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
My breasts were aching with rage.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Randomize
